Wine Occasion: Meeting The Parents

The first dinner with the future in-laws can be tense. It is your job to make a good first impression, demonstrating that you are the best possible mate for their daughter. Obviously you have to bring a gift, and what better gift than a bottle of wine. Be careful here – this situation requires delicate balance. You want to seem sophisticated enough to know your wines. But you don’t want to seem like you drink SO much wine that you have a sophisticated knowledge. You want to buy a bottle of quality so you don’t seem spendthrift. However, you don’t want to buy too expensive of a bottle to seem extravagant and wasteful. Basically, good luck with all of that.

There are other considerations that you must confirm. First off, make sure the parents drink. And they approve of you drinking. And marrying their daughter. Once those things are out of the way, time to procrastinate your way to the wine aisle at the grocery store.

A side note: You might read in a lot of other places that you need to consider what’s for dinner, to pair red wines with meats and white wines with seafood and poultry. I am here to say that this is all crap. Drink what you like. Or at least what you think the future in-laws will like. That being said, ask your fiancé what her parents like to drink.

Wine Suggestions:

$ White – La Ferme Julien Blanc

This is a wine from the Rhone Valley in France (you don’t need to know where it is, you just need to know that it’s pronounced “ROAN”). It’s made from the Perrin family, which is known for their wines in Southern Rhone – an area called Chateauneuf du Pape (the Pope’s New Castle). Did you know there were two papal centers in the 14th Century? One was in Rome, and the other in Avignon (Southern Rhone). See what interesting conversations you can find yourself with a bottle of wine?

$ Red – Sandeman Ruby Port Wine

I’m throwing a curveball here. Port is a dessert wine from Portugal, so it’s to be drunken AFTER dinner. There are different styles of Port, and I’ve suggested here a Ruby style. This is a bit more sweet and the style name connotes the color as well. This is a solid choice because it’s drinkable for mom yet masculine enough for dad. You win both ways.

$$ White - Veuve Cliquot Champagne Brut

This is the classic standard for all champagnes. And yes – this is champagne because it was made from grapes grown in Champagne, France. All other sparkling wines NOT made in Champagne are called sparkling wines, NOT Champagne. Okay, sorry, I needed to get that off my chest.

Anyway, about Veuve Cliquot - François Clicquot owned a champagne house in the early 19th century but died young. His bride, Nicole-Barbe Ponsardin, became a veuve (French for widow), and took over the family business, making it into the success it is today. She also wore black for the rest of her life, never remarrying and instead mourning her fallen husband till the end of her days. You can mention to the future in-laws this is what you expect from their daughter as well.

$$ Red - Trefethen Estate Cabernet Sauvignon

You cannot go wrong by buying Napa Cabernet Sauvignon. This is the quintessential American wine. Napa Cab (as Cabernet Sauvignon from Napa is also known) made Americans proud because in the 70’s, they trounced French Bordeaux wines (the region in France also known for its Cabernet Sauvignon) in blind taste tests. Therefore, any red-blooded American will LOVE Napa Cab. It’s just patriotic to do so.

Note: If your fiancé and/or her parents is/are from France, buy Bordeaux and claim that the blind tastings in the 70’s were rigged…

Things to Consider When Choosing Wine

So how should we start? There are five things to consider before making any wine purchase. I will list them, in order of least to most important.

1) What you're eating

I will make a statement later in the guide that dispels the common notion that you drink red wines with meat and white wines with poultry, seafood, vegetables, and soccer moms. However, there is some merit in considering the menu that will be served at whatever event to which you’re bringing the wine.

For example, most red wines are very strong and can over power food. That’s why steak and other hearty foods are paired with red wines – because the hearty foods can stand up to the strong red wine. Now image drinking a really big red wine with a delicate sliver of butter fish. What will you taste? I’ll tell you – you won’t taste the butter fish!

Therefore, it is important to consider what you’re eating. For a barbeque, bring a red wine from California. For Burning Man, bring a white wine (I’m assuming that there will be plenty of vegetarians to hang out with in the desert). You get the picture.

2) What’s the occasion

For example, don’t bring a $200 bottle of French Bordeaux to a weenie roast. Or Two Buck Chuck to your boss’ retirement at the Ritz. We will assist you with this consideration in Part 1.

3) Who’s your audience

This ties in with the previous consideration. You’re hanging with your bros watching a game? Not the best time to crack out the Burgundy.

Remember, when bringing wine to any occasion, you must consider who will be there and consequently consider what they will like to drink. A better bet would be to think about the hosts and what they like to drink. You will never get kicked out of a party by being considerate to the hosts.

4) Your personality

This is where you can make a statement on who you are or what your interests are. You spent a year in the Outback studying cacti? Buy some Australian Shiraz. You hate America? Buy some French Bordeaux. You have an affinity to former landlocked international powers that flamed out in the mid-nineteenth century? There are some lovely Austrian wines for you.

Wines can be a wonderful departure point for interesting and poignant conversations. Let the wine you select represent you and allow you to share more about yourself to your hosts.

5) What you like

Above all else, to thine own self be true. Drink what you like. You like sweet wines? Get some Blue Nun (or real German Reisling). You like cherries jubilee? Get some Cabernet Sauvignon. You don’t like white wine? Get some red wine.

The most important thing here is that you bring wines that you’re happy with and you’re proud of drinking. Your wine is good enough, it’s smart enough, and by gosh people like it!

The Start of a Simple Guide

I’m sure you’ve experienced the following scenario: you’re late for a party and you have ten minutes to run into a grocery store, pick up a bottle of wine, and arrive at the shindig before all the booze/girls/food is gone. One problem – you don’t know jack about wine. What should you get?

We’ve written this to guide you through this dire strait. We will teach you, nurture you, and then set you off into the world so you can forever be capable of choosing the best bottle of wine for any given occasion. In turn, your fellow party-goers and hosts will respect you more, like you more, and hopefully invite you again next time.

Of course, wine is not one size fits all. You might have to do a little research to find the right place to get these wines. (On a side note, when did “googling” constitute research?). Most of these selections should be available at a local Safeway or Trader Joe’s. If you’re lucky enough to have a wine shop close by, you can ask the shopkeeper for suggestions of similar wines.

More to come!